The Day I Became A Heart Mother

I found this poem while surfing the web. I don't know who wrote it so I can't give credit. But I think whoever wrote it must have looked through a window into my heart and wrote the words they found there. (Posted in Green in honor of the donor who saved Noah's life.)

One day my world came crashing down,

I'll never be the same.

They told me that my baby was sick.

I thought, "Am I to blame"?

I don't think I can handle this.

I am really not that strong.

It seemed my heart was breaking.

I have loved him for so long.

I will not give up on this child.

I will listen to your advice.

I will give my son any chance.

No matter what the price.

I will learn all that I need

To help my baby thrive.

I'll even use that feeding tube.

My child must survive!

Will he need a lot of therapy?

Will he gain the needed weight?

Please God, help me do this.

As I accept our fate.

When the monitors beep at night,

it serves as my reminder.

How many parents would love that sound.

Tomorrow I will be kinder.

As another Angel earns his wings,

I run to my baby's bed.

I watch him sleep for quite a while.

I bend down and kiss his head.

I cry for the parents whose hearts have been broken.

I look to You wondering why?

Oh Lord, I just can't know your ways....

no matter how I try.

And yet, I trust you hold his life,

and guide us through each day.

My mind says savor each moment he's here,

but my heart begs, "PLEASE let him stay"!

From pacing the surgical waiting room,

to sitting by his bed.

From wishing for a good nights sleep,

to learning every med.

From wondering, "Will he be alright?",

to watching him reach out his hands.

With every smile my heart just melts,

despite life's harsh demands.

For all who see that faded line.

I look to them and smile.

You see my child is loved so much.

I would face ANY trial.

That scar I trace with my finger

(It's the door to his beautiful heart).

God must have known how much I'd love him

(Just as He loved him from the start).

A heart mom is always a heart mom.

Now wise beyond her years.

For those who have angels in heaven,

Our hearts share in all of your tears.

Every day I will try and remember,

I was chosen for him (and no other).

I will always embrace that beautiful day.......

When I became a "Heart Mother".